Rebecca's Blogs

After Dad passed the state-required competency test, he continued to drive. That was in March of 2002. Mother passed away in April, 2002. The live-in, Josephine, continued to stay in their home, looking after my bereaved Dad. Whether it was the stroke, aging, grief, depression or the beginning of Alzheimer's, Dad could not remember to take his medicine. The live-in remained until July, 2002, when Dad moved into a lovely assisted-living facility. Okay, let's be honest, I moved him into the facility. 

When my dad was diagnosed with Alzheimer's, he was in the mild cognitive impairment stage. People with mild cognitive impairment (MCI) have mild changes in their memory and thinking ability. These changes aren't significant enough to affect work or relationships yet. The trip to the doctor for testing that will render a diagnosis of dementia most often occurs when it becomes clear to family and doctors that a person is having trouble with memory and thinking that impacts daily functioning.

Imagine if, for ten or more months, you could not visit with your loved one except through a window.

Wonder if each time you visited, you found your loved one mentally and physically declining in ways that are obvious to you, but ignored by facility employees.

Try to picture your loved one with dementia reaching out to you, wanting a hug, yearning for a tender touch, and crying because you won't oblige.

There’s no doubt dementia diminishes the ability for effective communication between the patient and caregiver. When people can’t comprehend what is being said, or can’t find the words to express their own thoughts, it can be painful, embarrassing and frustrating.

"I had a talk with the administrator of my Mom’s facility today. I told her I was coming to get Mom on Friday. I’m taking her out. Taking her home. Those are some of the best words I have ever said. I just finished her bedroom today. I am so excited for Friday. My heart aches for those of you that cannot take your loved ones out. I have struggled all these months. Sleepless nights. Knot in my stomach. So many tears. I know it won’t be easy. But, I’m doing it. I’m doing it."  From a member of Caregivers For Compromise 

A room for Mom...

Children are moving their dementia-afflicted parents out of long-term care facilities due to fears about COVID-19’s high fatality rates, and/or because they recognize that imposed isolation is accelerating their parents’ cognitive and physical decline.

In becoming the primary parental caregiver, children also become the primary communicator, which can present complications and frustrations that soon become overwhelming.

We’re a nation of busy, burdened people. Holding home and hearth and body and soul together during this turbulent time takes more energy than we ever thought we could muster.

Living with the undercurrents of fear, grief, and uncertainty depletes our energy reserves even further.

Coping and decision-making require the incessant usage our time, talents and vigor. You might wonder, how much worse can it get?

Health Care Surrogate. Medical-system navigator. Caregiver. Advocate. Decision maker. Cast about in your mind and ask yourself, “Who will be this person for me when I need them?"

Have you ever had a destination in mind, but were waylaid, and ended up where you were really meant to be?

 We left for a family Christmas in Louisiana, intending to visit the Civil Rights Memorial Center in Montgomery, Alabama on the way. My husband had confirmed it would be open on December 23^rd, so we were there at 10 a.m., waiting for the doors to open.

Oprah’s speech at the Golden Globes was the unchallenged highlight of the evening. There she was, an icon who was saying the words that had to be said, in a tone that resonated with strength, not rancor, and at a time when we most needed to hear them.

It disturbs me that with every stroke of his pen, Trump is pulling another plank from the platform that upholds the lower-and-middle classes of this country. From hobbling workers' rights to decimating healthcare,

REKINDLING THE TORCH OF CHOICE

Those of us who are over 50 have reached that comfortable age when we no longer have to worry about an unintended pregnancy. For us, the issue of reproductive choice has faded in importance. But for our daughters and granddaughters of

A friend of mine, at the age of 55, was in a new relationship that was heading towards sexual intimacy. Concerned because she had not had sex in three years, and knowing from experience that it could be a painful encounter because of vaginal dryness, she asked me—a sexually active woman in a twenty-seven-year marriage—what I used to combat that discomfort.

There was a debate raging on LinkedIn recently, when someone asked the question, "What value do you put on authors when they describe themselves as 'Award Winners?'"

I have just self-published my third book in 15 months, and although there has been a great deal of satisfaction in writing those books, I know I need to take a breather--but my "purpose" in writing them won't allow me to do so!

I self-published my first two books, MORAL INFIDELITY and DOUBLING BACK TO LOVE, at the age of 59. Yes, quite a late age to start a career in writing. In this, my 60th year, I published Book 1: HE'S JUST A MAN: Making the Most of Your Womanly Power.

Other than hitting a best-seller list, can you imagine anything that could be more rewarding for a new author than to have her second novel ‘plucked from the many’ for inclusion in an anthology with nine other authors?

When Jennifer Theriot approached me about joining the Peace, Love, & Romance anthology, I was honored, but also hesitant. Was my book a good fit? Could it hold its own against the books written by Amazon best-selling authors?